Bloggy # 5! Judging people.

Are you readyyy…?  Of course you are. You’ve been waiting all week for me and yes it’s still flattering and I LOVE IT! It's not like i promote it on a Saturday night when I'm out or anything? Or like to anybody I know... Or ask them to let other people know. Or like post it somewhere. Because that's just sad.

Before I get into it... I have two things to say:

1. My Cat Clock came! He speaks the time in Hong KongER. But it does have the temperature in Degrees Celsius. I have also some how managed to make it update the hour, every hour loudly. LIKE AIR HORN LOUD. its 'alarming'. But really its alarming... so I should make it a center piece for the living room or something cos it's still cool.
2. I've been asked by some sheepies to mention them in my bloggy mcblog blog, so hey! Hey there fellow yabbiers from last week!! I would write a blog on yabbying but there’s not enough to say. You go, you yabby, you get dirty and then you leave hoping there’s enough petrol to get you back to Bendigo.

On a very serious note. I’ve decided on the topic “JUDGING PEOPLE (usually people I refer to as douche bags, knob jockeys, dickheads, bottom of the barrelers ect) TO THE BEST OF YOUR ABILITY.” Yes, because I feel there are certain people in our society who are letting us down.

You know that saying, “can’t judge a book by its front cover?” Well you definitely can. Judging people is one of the things I do best. I spent days at Uni just staring at people and judging their clothes, walks, what they were eating and their faces. I wasn’t always harsh but most of the time I was. In all my years living I found these guidelines to be the most prominent.

A few guidelines that everyone should (or shouldn’t) follow:

1. If your hair looks wet, wash it. We don’t want people thinking you’re from Eaglehawk.
2. White sunglasses on man or woman are not acceptable. They should be snapped and turfed immediately.
3. Underwear that shows above or below garments is inappropriate.
4. If some asks you whether it’s a top or a dress? Don’t wear it as a dress you slut.
5. Just because you can get the clothes on doesn't mean it’s your size. If you can see the belly button hole through the top – too tight.
6. If you look like a unicorn your hairs too high.
7. Boys… please do not ever wear black socks unless you’re wearing a black suit.
8. Fellas, you are going to regret wearing those b ball jerseys and flat beak caps in 3 years, you look so silly.
9. Men of any age (key point any age) do not dye your hair. Grey hairs hot and well if your ginger it’s about time you stopped fighting it (we all know).
10. Man bags oh no! It’s not OK because Indiana Jones had one…or Alan (yes Alan is cool but you are not part of the wolf pack). Bags are only okay in back pack form (there something sort of attractive about a man with a backpack, but if he offers you lollies decline).
11. There’s something about a man carrying a Biro like his on a mission. Maybe a mission to write his number down on paper and hand it to me.
12. Business Cards they are not an automatic in (although cool). When they are flaunted they lose their appeal.
13. If someone hot asks you for directions. Give them directions to your house.
14. If someone who is a potential interest pronounces TH like F. Run away.
15. If I can hear who you mounted on the weekend lower your voice. You may have done well, batted above your average… but unless they're my boyfriend or his girlfriend we don’t overly care.

Okay so now those last 3 are not initial judgments on appearance they are still in the early stages of judging.

AND that is how I do it. I’m open to numeral ratings too... E.g;

Guideline # 13 . Rating = 10 (highest rating)

Guideline # 2. Rating = Not worth any rating.


You are welcome! (I want to put a smiley face here, but I'm aware its stupid)

YOUR THE BEST, RACHI METS xx