Being a 'largie'

Being a largie isn’t easy. Actually it is. It’s very easy. Walking to and from the fridge is the tough bit… but I manage ok.

The other day I came to the realization that I have gotten beyond ‘fluffy” (or chubby-fat). Fluffy is the term I like to give myself over the summer break when I indulge in more food cos most of my time is spent at home, near the fridge. Usually when netball comes around the fluff lessens. However not playing netball this season has got me a tad worried.

I came to the realization when I was on EBay and I was deciding what size dress to buy. I thought should I get a tight ten or just admit I’m going to need a 12. What to do, what to do. I got the ten. I received the dress and I can get it on, zip it up but I am unable to bend. So I figure the dress is suitable for events that require me to stand the entire evening or judging by the Bendigo crowd any Saturday night OR I could just lose the excess fluff and slide into it perfectly.

I’ve started a sight exercise regime, ‘Restorative Yoga.’ This is aired at about 3.30am on channel 80 - GEM. It’s a sexy man doing the downward dog. Yes it’s doing me wonders. I’m just concerned I should be sleeping whilst this is on. Instead I find myself doing restorative yoga on my new queen size bed that is too large for sleeping but the perfect size for late night yoga.My issue is the man humming, like literally humming. It gets to a stage and he starts going HUMMMMMMMMMMM… HUMMMMMMMMMM… and its loud. Very loud! Maybe because it’s 3.45 in morning or maybe because his humming right in my speakers, which isn’t soothing at all. I refuse to hum! I find opening my arms up to the gods is stupid enough… let alone hum! Humming like a dick head. I don’t care how sexy you are when you hum you go from a 10 to 3. It  belittles you as a man or person.

feel I need to expand my horizons from restorative yoga. With the exception of Zumba! There’s no way in hell I’m trying Zumba. I hate the idea and the sound of it. The only way you would get me to do Zumba is if you paid me and paid me well cos they look as much of a dickhead as the man sounded humming yoga noises.

I’ve got a few friends who box. I’m not a massive boxer lover. I’d rather UFC it. No, but seriously I find punching aggressive and I like my training sessions to be more enjoyable. Something with balls… Get your mind out of the gutter! I like ball sports (except soccer because that is not a real sport). Maybe a bit of old school poison ball… but you need friends for that.  

Skipping! Skipping is fun… High, low, jolly, pepper… Except you need two friends for that, dang! I could skip by myself and not play high, low, jolly… but that’s just sad.

I also refuse to do Wii-Fit (as an exercise). It does not make you fit and people who try to pass that off as exercise should be ashamed of themselves… Go hum the Zumba!

So you’re thinking gee whiz Rach doesn’t like anything! Wrong! I like tennis, netball, I think I could like golf once I got the hang of it, mini golf (not really an exercise but more so than Wii Fit), swimming (or surfing), steps, hiking, scootering, rollerblading …anything on wheels really except bike riding (I’d rather crawl and I’m never wearing lycra) oh crap! Before I know it I’m back on to stuff I don’t like! Maybe…FLY FISHING! That would give me giant arm muscles. Really tone up my arms. I could do it in shape-ups so I can tone up that bum of mine and then no one would ever see me in them, I do wonder if they work but I am never wearing them. No way am I being that girl that changes out of her business shoes into shape-ups or runners to walk to work (when I get a job).

I understand it’s not just fitness that gets you a super good body (fit-rig) but what you put into your mouth… I eat well. I just lack portion control (two schnitzels, chips and salad in one sitting, I’ll bring it up every blog if I have too). The vegetable patch out the back is doing wonders for home cooked meals. Our fresh produce is like Coles… We do not freeze or thaw our veggies either! I may however need to make adjustments to soft-drink intake. For my belly’s sake and for my dentist (which I’m not going back to for awhile as she will make me get my wisdom teeth out too, what a bitch).

So hopefully in 6 months I’ll be smoking hot. But in the mean time if you want an enjoyable game of tennis give me a buzz! I may not be Roger Federer but I can hit it back most of the time.

YOUR THE BEST, RACHI METS xx